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Concentrating on good qualities

Concentrating on the good qualities of other people helps to bring forward these values in ourself, and also gives real encouragement to others.

Over the New Year I heard an audio talk from my spiritual teacher, Sri Chinmoy, which offered one simple suggestion for the New Year.

“In the New Year, instead of focusing on people’s bad qualities, concentrate only on their good qualities. For the New Year, make it your resolution to always see good qualities in others and forget about their bad qualities.”

This was the essence of the talk as I remember. A very simple message, but repeated several times, I felt the idea sinking into my mind.

The idea behind this message is highly relevant for everyone.

Whoever we are, it is the nature of the human mind to hold onto the flaws and failings of people around us. It is their undivine qualities – ego and jealousy, which irritate us. When we are displeased with someone, it becomes hard to value their good qualities, which may lie hidden underneath. But, even the most irritating acquaintances and work colleagues will have at least a few good qualities.

Why is it important?

The first benefit is that it will help us to be happier. If we concentrate on people’s bad qualities, we may gain a little feeling of superiority, but this does not give real happiness. If we can appreciate other people’s good qualities, it will give us a sense of satisfaction and self-giving. Read On…

The Golden Age

I am reading a book about the Golden Age of Atlantis [1]. It is a picture of Heaven on Earth, a world with no conflict, but a society where willing individuals see and feel the underlying unity of the universe. There are some sections I skim through (it does have quite a new age vibe) But, the interesting thing about the book was the depiction of a golden age, where people were predominantly spiritual and the prevailing culture was one of connection to God, the Ultimate Source in every aspect of life.

Whether it is true or just the writers imagination, is perhaps not important. The idea of a golden age – a world where spiritual oneness and peace are the predominant qualities of the world does touch at an inner core of our being. The hope of every soul must be to someday live through a golden age, where real spirituality is natural, spontaneous and all-pervasive.

The current world situation is certainly a far cry from any golden age – though it is often said the night is darkest before the dawn.

I feel optimism and belief in a better world are not just building castles in the sky. Optimism and faith in the divine potential of man and the world are an important foundation for creating this future golden age.

The Golden Age will rapidly blossom
In the hearts of those
Who most devotedly love God
And at the same time
Shall not remain detached
From His earth-family.

Sri Chinmoy

References

[1] Discover Atlantis – Diana Cooper

Personal meditation techniques

My meditation teacher Sri Chinmoy gave many different meditation techniques, but also suggested that the real secret of meditation was – not just mastering technique – but our heart’s inner cry. If we are satisfied with what we have in the material world, then our meditation will not be very deep. However, if we feel a deep inner cry for peace and joy, then whatever technique we use we will be able to make faster progress.

Nevertheless, these are some techniques which I find helpful and use in my own meditation.

Mantra

During the day, when the outer world is a little more restless, I like to repeat a mantra. I use ‘Supreme’ which is a term Sri Chinmoy uses to describe God in his ever transcending aspect. By repeating the mantra Supreme, I feel it is both meditation and invocation. I try to repeat the mantra in the heart, to try and awaken the heart chakra. It is often recommended to count a certain number of mantras 500, 600, 700. However, although I often use mantra beads, I don’t tend to count. I start off relatively fast, but try to repeat the mantra more soulfully and with more awareness. For me the goal is not to achieve a certain number, but to say more soulfully and without any mental distraction.

Heart

Trying to meditate in the mind is difficult because the nature of the mind is to produce thoughts. If we can move away from the mind to the heart, then we are in a better place to meditate. Whatever technique of meditation, I usually try to be in the heart; there is a good spiritual energy there. If you really concentrate on the heart, you can start to feel your sense of being shift – from the head to the heart.
Read On…

Inner peace and Facebook likes

When I was at university 1994-97, none of my friends had a mobile phone or internet access. If you wanted to meet up with a friend, you would walk down to the other end of the corridor and knock on their door. I have to admit it was sometimes a little inconvenient, you could knock on their door, and no-one was there; but I seem to remember we had a good time!

From a spiritual perspective, how does social media and browsing of the internet influence our meditation and spiritual practise? Is it a harmless side-show or does it make it harder to achieve real peace of mind?

Like anything it can depend on how we use it, and also the inclinations of the user. A disciplined use of a work account a few times a week – is very different to those who find themselves spending hours everyday.

The influence of modern technology is definitely an interesting challenge for modern seekers. I now make a living from an economics website and regularly use email. However I constantly find myself (most weeks!) making New Year’s Resolutions to try and limit the time I waste on the internet. I don’t think I’m the only one in this boat either. Read On…

Choosing peace over conflict

This is a thought-provoking aphorism on peace [Source] . What can we learn from it?

Peace is the most valuable quality

Without peace, all the material objects in the world will not give joy. It is peace which will make us inwardly rich, yet peace is often the thing the world lacks most.

“This world has everything
Save and except one thing,
Peace,
And this peace has to blossom
From within.”

– Sri Chinmoy [2]

Don’t wait for tomorrow

If something is good to do, now is the best time. If we have a bad habit, now is the best time to break it. Sometimes, we can feel ‘maybe when I am an old man and retired, I will then have the time to give up bad habits and meditate on peace.’ But, if we keep delaying, we may surrender completely to the bad habit and wrong way of living. By the time we are old, we are stuck with our bad habits. If we can see a new approach to life which will bring more peace of mind and happiness, we should choose this path straight away – whilst we still have the enthusiasm and aspiration. To meditate on peace requires determination and sincerity, the sooner we start the better.

How to buy peace?

We can’t buy peace with money. We can only buy peace with our own inner attitude. For example, sometimes we have to give up our pride in order to gain peace in return. If pride comes to the fore, it makes us unwilling to change and we can persist in a wrong course of action. But if we lose the desire to be proved right, then we can gain inner peace. If we live in a state of desire and expectation, we will not experience peace because some desires will always remain unfulfilled and we will feel frustration. This is the price for attaining peace – giving up our desire and pride.

Escalation of conflict or choosing peace

In life we come across situations where we have a choice how to respond. One choice is to respond to an initial confrontation with escalating the conflict. If we have hurt feelings, the response of the mind and vital is invariably to retaliate. If we feel hurt, we subconsciously want to project this back onto others. But, this tit for tat attitude will make peace more distant and harder to achieve.

The other response is to invoke the heart and the quality of peace. Rather than retaliating, the heart can be sympathetic to the struggles of others, and we seek to be the one to let go of the unfortunate situation. This magnanimous attitude is often the best way of bringing the good qualities of others to the fore. If someone else is full of anger, we won’t diminish their anger by getting angry in response. But, if we remain calm and peaceful, they will respond in a better way. Through forgiveness and maintaining our inner peace, their conscience will come to the fore and secretly they will be inspired by our calm attitude.

No price is too great to pay for inner peace.

“No price is too great to pay for inner peace. Peace is the harmonious control of life. It is vibrant with life-energy. It is a power that easily transcends all our worldly knowledge.”

– Sri Chinmoy [3]

Choosing inner peace does not mean sacrificing principles and truth. It means we reject the negative emotions of jealousy and pride, but invoke a real and meaningful quality of peace instead. It means whatever happens in the outer world, we hold onto our inner peace.

This inner peace is more than just intellectual understanding. We have to pray, meditate and serve to gain a real sense of peace. The peace that comes from the heart is a powerful reality that will convince the mind.

Related

Quotes on peace

The secret of inner peace by Sri Chinmoy

Basic steps for learning meditation

In many of my articles on self improvement, I often suggest meditation can be an invaluable aid to alleviating many of our daily problems. I don’t look upon meditation just as a problem solver, I meditate because I enjoy the consciousness of meditation. But, if we can gain real peace of mind through meditation, there is no problem that cannot be helped in some way. These a few preliminary steps for learning how to meditate.

meditation

1. Location

Firstly, find a suitable quiet place for meditation. If it is very hard to find somewhere quiet, use some meditative music to drown out background sounds. If possible keep a corner of your room reserved just for meditation; this will help build up a meditative vibration in that particular part.

2. The basics

It is important to meditate with a straight back. (If you try meditating whilst lying down, you are more likely to fall asleep, than entering into a high state of meditation.)
Don’t meditate after eating a heavy meal – you will feel lethargic and sleepy.
If possible shower and wear clean clothes before meditating.
Try to switch off. If you try to meditate straight after work, you may be still thinking about the day. Try reading some books on meditation to help make the transition from work to meditation.

Read On…

Be careful in rushing to judgement

It is easy to make snap judgements based on partial information and first impressions, but these quick judgements can be misplaced. These are a few things to bear in mind.
tree

Who is responsible?

When something goes wrong we often look for somebody to blame. The train is late, so we get angry with the train staff; but the problem may be completely out of their control. We shouldn’t blame someone when they have endeavoured to do their best given the circumstances. We have all been on the other side of the coin – where we have been judged and blamed, despite it being due to factors beyond our control. Sometimes it is those under intense pressure, who most deserve our patience and understanding.

Worst case scenario

A tendency of the human mind is to anticipate the worst. By nature the mind is suspicious, and if something happens we put a negative slant on it; however, there is a danger this negativity can become self-fulfilling. If we expect something bad, it is more likely to manifest. Instead, if we suspend this negative judgement, we often find that things turn out better than we expected. This is why it is important to avoid rushing to a negative judgement.

Judgement leads to conflict

If we are quick to judgement it can make other people defensive and confrontational. If we approach an issue with an open mind and open heart, we help to facilitate a better outcome – in which the other person can modify their approach. Read On…

The Master’s indifference

This is a short story which is semi-autobiographical. It touches on issues relating to expectation and seeing beyond outer appearances.

bw-meditation

There was a spiritual Master who had many disciples. At times, he would express great concern about their health or spiritual progress. Sometimes, no detail was too small for the Master’s concern – be it work, health or their own meditation. At other times, during weekly meditations, the Master would be lost in trance – deep in communion with the Highest Reality.

When a new seeker called Rakhal joined the path, he was surprised to find his Master appeared indifferent to his new arrival. As the disciples filed past the Master, the Master would offer broad smiles to his established disciples, but when it was Rakhal’s turn the Master closed his eyes and seemed to look the other way.

To some extent, Rakhal was puzzled; he expected his Master to treat everyone in the same way, yet it appeared the Master was showing favouritism to his older disciples. However another thought also came to Rakhal’s mind – despite the outer indifference, he felt inner peace and happiness while coming into the Master’s presence – even if he was outwardly ignored.

Over time Rakhal became used to this differing treatment and no longer expected to get a smile from his Master. He realised that outwardly the Master treated everybody in a different way, depending on what the individual disciple really needed.

Gradually, Rakhal felt even the Master’s indifference was an important lesson – the Master was wanting to teach Rakhal to let go of expectation, but instead develop his inner faith and inner connection.

After a few years, Rakhal had largely overcome his own expectations of how his Master should treat him. But then, when he least expected it, his Master would offer a divine smile or offer short words of encouragement. Rakhal was happy – both to receive the outer attention of the Master, and also because he had learnt to be detached about whether the Master spoke to him or not.

Then, out of the blue, the Master passed to the other world, and Rakhal was deeply upset to lose the outer, inspiring presence of his Master. But, now more than ever, the disciple was grateful for his Master’s lessons in detachment and learning to value the inner essence of spirituality.

Photo top: Sri Chinmoy meditation 1970s

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